In the interest of taking my mind off of the million things I have to do (assemble and address invites, find a new home or homes for my cats, clean my house, do actual WORK at work, etc), let’s take a humorous look at some of the leading search terms that bring people to my little slice of paradise, shall we?
1. “how to not worry about things”
Hmmm, when you get that figured out, would you let me know? Because I could totally use a lesson in how to take my mind off of the multitude of things that worry me and stress me out. What usually works for me is drinking several glasses of wine and then passing out. Worst case scenario: I’ll wake up in puddle of my own drool with a massive headache. Best case scenario: total and utter unconsciousness. Perfect.
2. “what life should be mid 20s”
If you guessed: a series of mistakes mixed with a few occasions of total and utter happiness and pride combined with far too many drunken escapades where you wake up naked next to someone whose name you can’t remember thrown in with too many shitty jobs and too little pay, then you’d be right.
Only, if you were me it would go something like this: blah blah shitty family, blah blah, broke all the time, blah blah owning a house that plummeted in value 1 year after you bought it, blah blah, but at least I love my fiance’!
3. “chasing paradise wordpress”
Hi. Thank you for googling my blog, Chasing Paradise. You might want to bookmark it. Or subscribe to it via your Google reader. You know, just to cut down the search time.
4. “slutty lingerie”
I assume this must be brought to us via my Sexy Little Things post, wherein I showed everyone my wedding day lingerie. I didn’t find it slutty in the least, but if you did, then fuck you. No seriously. I kid, I kid!
And finally, my top personal favorite…
5. “why does my friend stay with her bf when he treats her like shit?”
This one drives a lot of traffic to my site. For reals. It’s constantly one of the most used searches that bring people here. I guess there are a lot of people out there in my situation that basically has to tolerate seeing a good friend get shat on (yes I said shat) by a major douchebag. In the case of my friend, I have no idea why she stays. He is so unappreciative of what he has in her, and it’s sickening. But I’ve learned, rather slowly and painfully, that the best thing you can do is…NOTHING. Be there for your friend. Only give your opinion when asked for it. And most of all, support her no matter what. Leaving him is a decision she’ll have to make on her own and in her own time.
Now, does anyone know where I can find a stiff cocktail and a huge piece of cheesecake at the unGodly hour of 10:00 a.m.?
No? Thanks anyway.
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