Wednesday, September 16, 2009

seriously, this isn't cool, man

i don;’t have a phone.  so you have to e-mail me instead.  what the fuck, i was in brooklyn, that’s all.  i don’t even know how to deal with this.  How do I tell Apple, is there a my-iphone-has-been-stolen form that I can fill out?  they say you have to cancel your service so the predators aren’t allowed access to make calls to…St. Tropez, or whatever.  How do I do that without a phone?

Have you seen my phone?  It’s a 3G iPhone with a hard, white, incase case.  my wallpaper is a picture of my cat, sleeping.  he’s grey.  I think I took a cab back to my place, in fact, I totally did.  Mr. Cab Driver was nice.  I didn’t leave anything in his car, I checked.

Where the fuck is it?  Just give it to me already!  You’re not innarested in my apps anyway, iPhone snatcher.  Oh, and I have a password, so good luck making drug dealing calls to Nigeria or whatever.  I hate you, iPhone jacker.  I hope you get your balls/boobs cut off, somehow, and rot in hell afterwards, you heartless prick/bitch.  Go die in hell.

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